Category Archives: “music”

Fuck.

Lenny Kravitz has traveled so far up his own ass that he risks blinking out of existence and creating a black hole. Any just god would smite us all. Advertisements

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[Insert vile epithets here]

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Jungle

“Melancholy, slightly cerebral funk.”  And I don’t like music videos or dancing in general.  Go figure. These guys are opening for Outkast at the Montreal Jazz Fest and again, fuck you, Pierre. Also at Union Transfer June 19th – http://www.utphilly.com/event/529267-jungle-philadelphia/

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No-Talent Hick Cunt

FACT: Miley Cyrus is a no-talent, attention-whoring, and likely inbred hick cunt. Her act the other night was indeed a crime against humanity…but no more so than her father’s mullet-flavored brand of country rock used to be. You made Billy … Continue reading

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If You Don’t Like Boards of Canada, You Are an Asshole

[This is part one of what will be an ongoing series on why you should like everything I like, or you are an asshole.] Esoterics When we were 12 or 13, my brother and I found a book called “Big … Continue reading

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Sheep

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want He makes me down to lie Through pastures green He leadeth me the silent waters by. With bright knives He releaseth my soul. He maketh me to hang on hooks in … Continue reading

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Valentime

This is a Valentine for my wife, which I chose to make instead of standing with the other lovestruck fuckwits perusing the lame-ass Hallmark offerings at CVS. Hey, at least it isn’t accompanied by a vacuum with a bow. In … Continue reading

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The Susquehanna Bank Center Fucked Your Mother and There’s Nothing You Can Do About It

In July of 1996, I saw Steely Dan at what was then called “The Blockbuster/Sony Entertainment Center” in Camden.  It was my first trip to the venue, and I was initially turned away at the gate with my prohibited lawn … Continue reading

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All the other kids…

Tonight, my wife is taking our daughter and the neighbor’s kid to The Mann to see some band with a song called “Pumped Up Dicks”.  At least I assume that’s what it’s called…maybe I misheard the lyrics. Then again, maybe … Continue reading

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Confucius say…

“If one should desire to know whether a kingdom is well governed, if its morals are good or bad, the quality of its music will furnish the answer.” In other words, we are completely fucked.

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