Tag Archives: fuckyourblog

Fuck Christmas

I despise Christmas. I love my wife and kids. These things seem to be mutually exclusive. On one hand, my children love Christmas. I know I did when I was little. I’m not too old to remember getting excited about … Continue reading

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Knock knock

Me: Who’s there? My 3 year old son: Banana flake. Me: Banana flake who? Son (top of his lungs): POOP IN A TRASHCAN!

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Middul Amerukuh Haytes Olbammer

Well…thank fuck it’s over. Although he has yet to deliver on many of his 2008 campaign promises, I still like President Obama.  He’s charismatic, well-spoken, seems to have populist opinions, and isn’t a completely unelectable asshole.  I did, however, have … Continue reading

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Nickelback: Aural Hemorrhoid and Proud Partner of the NHL

There isn’t much that hasn’t already been said about the cultural black hole known as Nickelback, so I’ll keep this short. I have been very happy to see the NHL’s turnaround from being publicly ranked somewhere between the WNBA and … Continue reading

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Rihanna: Talentless Attention Whore

It’s funny that I’m blogging about attention whoring, considering that blogging itself is an attention whore’s raison d’être. [that’s attention-whore-ese for, “The french words I just used for ‘reason for existence’ are so sophisticated, don’t you think?”] I just saw … Continue reading

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How To Tell Your Seven-Year-Old That God Doesn’t Exist

Hocus-Pocus and Complete Bullshit Honey, listen.  Daddy’s got something to explain to you.  Some of the things I’ll say will be scary, and I might curse a lot.  But understand that I’m doing this because I love you very much … Continue reading

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